My Journey to find God
Reflections on my journey to find God.
‘Why can’t I find You?’ I asked of God, in frustration. ‘I have visited every house of worship, said every prayer, performed every rite to find You. And yet, Your presence eludes me’.
To my surprise, an apparition of Him floated before my eyes, beckoning me… urging me… to embark on a journey to find Him. ‘Look in the right place, and you shall find Me’ He said.
And so I stepped out… from my home, my fortress, my comfort zone, to search for His presence.
I traveled far. I traveled wide. I traveled long.
I visited the highest peaks, but I did not find Him. ‘The mountains are beautiful, but not beautiful enough for me to reside in’ He said.
I visited the rivers in every corner of my motherland, but He was still elusive. ‘The rivers overflow with my love’, He said, ‘carrying hope and subsistence to millions… and yet they cannot flow fast or wide enough to suffice my presence’
I visited the oceans, but He still wasn’t to be found. ‘The waters of all the oceans in the world are not enough to contain my love.’ He mentioned.
I looked up to the skies, searching millions of twinkling celestial bodies for a sign. But there was none. ‘The light of a million stars cannot match my brilliance’ He said.
I visited caves and caverns, but he did not appear. ‘I am light’, He said with a smile ‘yet you search for me in the dark’
I looked to the scriptures. But I was only confused further. ‘The scriptures can only show you the way’, He said ‘it is for you to find the destination, for words cannot describe me’.
Disappointed, dejected, defeated and tired, I headed back home. Sadness overwhelmed me, as I wondered where I should look, to find Him.
‘God is nowhere!’ I exclaimed in despair.
Almost as an answer to my blasphemy, His apparition was with me again…
‘I am nowhere, yet I am everywhere. I am nothing, yet I am everything. You may spend your life searching high and low, but the only place you will truly find me, is where you will look the least. You may feel I elude you. But are you searching in the right place?’
And that is when it dawned upon me. I was looking for light in darkness. Looking for day in the night. Searching in a dimension, where He did not exist.
‘Look inward’ He continued, with a benevolent smile.
‘For the reality you live, is an unending illusion… of needs and wants. Of greed and materialism. Of inconsequential tokens of perceived happiness.
Look inward and realize, that I made you in my own image. That I am you. And you are me.
Look inward and realize, that the journey you need to make, does not require you to move an inch from where you are presently.
For, while you spend your life searching for me in the external, I have been right here all along, arms outstretched, waiting for you to come back home.’
I was enlightened. I was happy. I was complete. I was with Him.
And then, suddenly, ‘God is nowhere’, read ‘God is now, here.’